so amazingly sick of everything
hello teen angst.

on the bright side, this guy is seriously cool.

:(

i hate it when you realize something and you have absolutely no control over it .
and even if i did, what am i going to do? destroy everything that took so long to build?
i don't want to do this anymore, i really fucking don'tttt.



hey beautiful

fucckkk

it's the last night of the holidays preetty much.
i don't know how to try at school anymore. i think i forgot how to be smart. i'm pretty sure i used to be smart?
tonight should be good though.

+ dear darcy; i'm sorry i'm such a bitch.

I've never bagged a babe. I'm not a stud.

the other day i watched the film 'Some kind of Wonderful.'
it was good but there was something about the end that i didn't like.
sadie thought it was because the main character ended up with the alternative girl instead of the popular one, but i'm pretty sure that's not it. i hope i'm not that shallow.
i have so much respect for John Hughes. i mean this is someone who not only wrote The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink and Sixteen Candles, but also wrote Home Alone. what a genius.

weekend

twenty-four hours with brigitte

*free slurpees
*barkly park
*pretend party
*talking to the neighbours
*gossip girl
*stalking ludo ? 'he's quite a looker' 'yeah' 'let's follow him' 'haha' 'no seriously, come on!'
*park near the gelati bar
*'it's a dog' it's a cat!!' 'it's seriously a piglike dog' 'a pug?' 'no! just a little dog' -random guy yells- 'it's a fucking cat!!!'
*gelati
*-one car honks at us- -next car yells 'sluts!'
*hannah montanna movie - 'tell me what happens when ...' 'never mind'
*teddy bears and care bears
*getting ready
*gross chromer guys oh goddddd 'i think i'm going to throw up. oh god i just gagged' -brigitte tries to talk more about them- 'stop i'm actually going to throw up!!!'
*'you know how we're always like 'if someone tried to rape me, wouldn't you just let them?'' 'yeah?' 'well could you really let them rape you O.O' 'naah i'd probably just stab them'
*trying to go to south melbourne beach and ending up at st kilda beach
*fucking jellyfish :|
*guys trying to impress us by splashing us heaps and then asking us to come with them...
*park and maccas cokeee
*shopping
*somehow going to luna park
*'what if i pee on the ride?' 'yeah and we get off and we're covered in urine'
*freaky ride 'look out the side!!!' 'NO!' 'seriously!' 'FUCKING HELL NO'
*-gets off ride- 'i'm all wet...did i pee?' 'eughhh sweat and pee'
*random guys: come give me head brigitte: yes come here and i will give all of you head at the same time :|
*-gets on tram- 'where are we...'

aaah i love you so much <3

silly.

there's a sense of fear,
a sense of despair.
it's all around you,
it's in the air.
you look around,
friend to friend,
but it's not them,
it's in your head.
nobody notices,
when you slip out of the light,
and sneak down the hall,
overwhelmed with fright.
you're weaving through,
the busy crowd.
their voices in your ear,
it's incredibly loud.
out of sight, out of mind.
the obstacles unseen.
i fall onto my knees,
in a reoccurring dream.

hm...

I actually really miss the country.
Or maybe I miss being a little kid, for me the two are so closely linked I don't really know which one I liked.
I love the memories I have there, even the upsetting ones.
Running around with puppy-version of Seamus, making slides in barns, swimming in lakes, running away from freaky chickens, naming the wombats that used to live in my backyard, riding horses, collecting kindling for the fire, anticipating the arrival of my dad and sister coming home from work and school, playing in the sandpit, catching the school bus, playing in the most elaborate tree houses and cubby houses, climbing massive hills, making a happy-hat, reading in cupboards, adoring my duck Charlotte, crying when Charlotte got eaten D:, Darcy, Xylis, Charlie, Charlotte, Seamus, Poppy, Sunflower, Duchess, *insert names of chickens I don't remember anymore*, boots, ripped jeans.
:)